How I’ve learnt to ride the Wave. Pt. 9 I’m Being Tested Today

Over the past 2 weeks I have spoken about the tool of being “In the Moment” and how I ultilise it for Riding the Waves in my life. This week I will wrap it up with another personal experience, of “Being Aware in the Moment”, which I hope you can relate to and grow from.

So aspects of today have been a bit rough for me. My heart has felt sad due to emotions around past relationships rising. Some tears have come to the surface to help with release and closure. I am sure many of you can relate. Maybe your heart has been broken? Maybe you have felt betrayed? There are many layer to what has been taking place for me, yet I will just focus on the basic level (the nitty gritty may be published at a later date).

From my aware state I know not to dwell on what is coming up for me, while at the same time I know not to shut it out. It’s a fine line between the two.

So how am I handling it??

I am maintaining my awareness as the emotions rise. I am allowing the remaining pain to rise, allowing the last bits of hurt and disappointment for what took place and for what may have been to flow through me. I am just allowing the feelings to flow. What I am NOT doing is allowing my mind to get carried away with it. I am choosing not to relive the drama, which would pull me down into a heap. Falling into a heap, placing blame and feeling sorry for myself was my unaware reaction before I woke up. I played this out many times over the years!! Just ask my friends. I was a big “Why Me” person. Either taking all the responsibility or none of it! 🙂

As I write this I can feel the feelings shifting through me, some are not pleasant, but I am choosing to not focus on them. They are just moving on. Some of what is coming up for me is taking a bit longer to clear out, yet I can feel it subsiding.

Ultimately what I know is this will not last. The grey cloud will return to sunlight at the perfect time for me. So this is only momentary. How you choose to class momentary is up to you.

You see, I understand the bigger picture of what is taking place. I am shifting out the old to make way for the new. If I hold on to what is coming up for me now, then I am blocking my movement forward. What I am feeling would still have hold over me, whether I am conscious of it or not. So I would rather have it come up and out, than keep it in. Can you see if you are resisting letting go? Are you creating drama? Are you playing out the same role or scenario over and over? Are you tired of this and ready for change?

The key is, how to get through it when it feels hard. In my first few notes I explained my basic process for this, so you may want to go back and read them.

So what have I done today to try and keep my balance and perspective?? I have chosen from my empowered place to ACCEPT what is taking place for me as it is happening IN THE MOMENT. I know not to ATTACH to it or convince myself it will last forever, telling myself my life is all doom and gloom. I have ALLOWED what is coming up to FLOW though me without creating drama around it and I have been actively keeping my thoughts at bay when I sense they have the potential to bring me down.

To help regain my alignment, I have deliberately been looking for all the blessings currently around me. I have chosen to see the positives from the past relationship in question. I see how I have grown and evolved as a result of my experiences. I have chosen to look at the bigger picture and create appreciation for all that is.

I made a choice to change my environment to somewhere more uplifting, so I am back at my regular coffee shop in Penang, where I am always welcomed with a smile. I have also listened to some uplifting music to soothe the process.

Is there still sadness? YES.

Is it clearing out? YES.

Am I calm during this clearing out? YES.

It is bringing me ultimate benefit? YES.

In summary, I encourage you to really look at your life experiences. Are you aware of what is taking place within you? Your thoughts, actions and words? Can you see if they are helping or hindering you? Over the next few weeks, start making the effort to observe yourself. Determine if you are responding or reacting to life. If you don’t like what you find, then I congratulate you on becoming aware. Now you are aware, you have the choice (when you are ready) to change it.

In the coming weeks I will expand on my process, share my experiences and offer tools to help raise your awareness and assist your expansion further.

I am Tracy Radley, a healer by heart and a leader by trait. I offer you is honesty, integrity and passion in all my interactions with you. May my discoveries be of support and inspiration as you further awaken to your own uniqueness and power.

I invite you to check in on my posts as I unveil to you my journey back to the light. If you have any general questions, please feel free to post them in the comments.

If you would like personal support along your path from someone who has been there, send me a private message to discuss my services.

Many blessings to you, Tracy ox



  • As I am writing about my own path and experiences, please respect this is my interpretation and yours may differ on some subjects I bring up.
  • Remember everyone has a right to their own opinion, we are all unique and it is not for anyone to judge.
  • If you do not agree with something, take it as a personal lesson and reflection for yourself on where your beliefs/values sit.
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